Well, nothing especially dramatic today happened.
I had 18 separate meetings today, most of them being brief annual employee evaluation one-on-ones where I asked questions about and discussed my staff's roles and all that sort of stuff. They're pretty tiring, especially when I booked most of them back to back. But I was able to focus on them completely. I'm normally good in one-on-one meetings because I find interacting with individuals really interesting.
But I also had group meetings. While I'm focusing really significantly better than I was a couple of weeks ago, I am more and more noticing my impulsivity trying to burst out with 'funny' comments. I don't think I'm more impulsive than before, but simply much more aware of my tendency. Now, some of my comments are funny.
At one point yesterday I explained to an ebullient and generally inappropriate sexist male director (who was hitting on one of my staff and asking if she likes to drink vodka because she is Russian) that "I have a feeling that the more vodka that you consume, the more attractive I would likely appear to you..." (Now, for full disclosure, in university one year my buddy and I dressed as hookers for the Halloween party and we were very unattractive as women. So basically, it would take a LOT of vodka for anyone to find me attractive, at least one looking for a woman...). Everyone chuckled. He back-pedaled, and I was able to regain control of the meeting. But there is a time and a place for everything. Perhaps that was okay, because it pushed him back, but in some meetings at my company, there are brutal undercurrents of rivalry and pettiness, and I need to stop being sensitive to that and trying to act as stand-up comedian referee, attempting to defuse the tension.
I don't think I can notice any side-effects today related to the Strattera. I think my anxiety has increased slightly because I find myself bruxing my jaw and teeth during the evening. But that too could be due to the change in the benzodiazapene from lorazepam to clonazepam, with its more gentle effect and softer time course of drug action. But I'm not shaking or quivering or trembling or wobbling or having a paroxysm (I'm running out of words here), so I guess the anxiety isn't all that bad.
I got a whole bunch of yard work done this evening. A bunch. A big ol' bunch. As my wife remarked after the fact with a look of awe and confusion in her face, it seemed due to an uncharacteristic 'burst of energy'. I also spent about 2 hours last night (until nearly midnight before I collapsed of exhaustion) cleaning the basement. The dog watched me from his supine position. He was trying to will me to go the hell to bed and shut the hell up. He's a good dog.
Maybe Strattera will make me clean stuff. Not obsessively, but from the already crazily messy state that I leave things in. Now THAT would be cool. Soon they'd be selling Strattera along with Mr. Clean Magic Erasers and those Swiffer floor cleaners:
"Take a tablet one hour before using our cleaning products and you'll be cleaning like you have never cleaned before."I worked in advertising for a few months. You'll now understand why it was only a few months.
Anyway, enough of this. I have some Tweeting to do with my @mungosadhd account.
Plus I have some updates needed for my Mungo's Military blog which I opened recently (hyperactive enough for yah?!)...
Cheers,
Mungo
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