On the weekend I mentioned it briefly to a friend of my brother at his wedding, it just seemed reasonable to mention it given the flow of the conversation, plus I was interested to know how someone I did not know would react. I also wanted to see how I would react afterward. The person looked at me a bit knowingly, then seemed at a loss for words, but luckily a distraction arose - a speech at the wedding. They seemed to make an effort to say something nice afterward so I take it I was not deemed completely insane. Plus they may have had some experience or knew about a friend with it - but I don't know.
And then today at my job, I had the first of several meetings that comprise my annual performance evaluation with my boss. In the discussion, I brought up my recent diagnosis during a specific conversation about some goals I had been trying to achieve last year (to which this performance evaluation would be directed). My boss nodded and said they knew all too well - they'd in fact been diagnosed themselves.
I had prepared well for the meeting, and described what efforts I will be making to further advance certain areas of my professional development. In thinking this out, and putting it to paper, I think I have a good road map (in development) of how I will improve my ability to deliver effectively at work in a consistent and timely way over the next few months.
I felt pretty calm about it during the rest of the meeting, and now I think this will help me in my job performance in the future. But now - an hour later - I am a large canvas sack full of varying emotions and flowing thoughts. I guess I feel mostly okay and optimistic about it, but wow. Whoa. This was a defining point in my post ADHD diagnosis life.
Damn, this stuff is HARD. But I'm getting through it, opportunity by opportunity, road block by road block, challenge by challenge and success by success.
I would be interested to hear in your comments what experiences you have had (or imagine that you will have) in telling or in not telling your boss or colleagues about your ADHD.
Cheers,
Mungo
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Telling my boss about my ADHD made absolutely no difference in his behavior towards me and my performance reviews whatsoever! It seemed to him just an excuse for my mistakes. Nevertheless, I think my awareness of my ADHD helped me, more than him.
ReplyDeleteI think having ADHD in many workplaces is not taken too seriously.
But, I congratulate you on your courage.
Brave man.
ReplyDeleteI don't think I could ever disclose my ADD at work. I'm not sure what it would gain me since I get pretty positive reviews in general. (Although, I do see now how my "growth" areas, which I've struggled with for years, naturally map to ADD.)
What was your goal in disclosing the diagnosis? Are you hoping for acknowledgment, help, or something else?
Thanks Amy, appreciate it!
ReplyDeleteDiscoveringADD - thanks - I feel brave about it...
My goal I guess is a bit fuzzy, but I think I wanted to help clarify some of my boss's concerns about a particular project which I was not delivering as well as I could have over the last year, and wanted my boss to understand my behaviour a little more. Our relationship is important for both of us, because we are both senior in the department, and often work closely as a team. I also trusted that my boss would at least listen and try to understand. I'd also had the sense that my boss has ADHD, because my boss appears to self-medicate with enormous amounts of nicotine gum, and my boss's behaviours seem familiar to me having read and having experienced ADHD first-hand.
I'm not really looking for special consideration or help, but now I am going to start to do things like shut my office door when it gets noisy, and I think my boss will understand that better (there is a bit of an informal rule not to shut our office doors, as it may give the wrong impression etc...). I want to begin using coping mechanisms that might somehow appear 'different' and I want to ensure that my boss is not surprised.
Cheers,
Mungo
Thanks Amy, appreciate it!
ReplyDeleteDiscoveringADD - thanks - I feel brave about it...
My goal I guess is a bit fuzzy, but I think I wanted to help clarify some of my boss's concerns about a particular project which I was not delivering as well as I could have over the last year, and wanted my boss to understand my behaviour a little more. Our relationship is important for both of us, because we are both senior in the department, and often work closely as a team. I also trusted that my boss would at least listen and try to understand. I'd also had the sense that my boss has ADHD, because my boss appears to self-medicate with enormous amounts of nicotine gum, and my boss's behaviours seem familiar to me having read and having experienced ADHD first-hand.
I'm not really looking for special consideration or help, but now I am going to start to do things like shut my office door when it gets noisy, and I think my boss will understand that better (there is a bit of an informal rule not to shut our office doors, as it may give the wrong impression etc...). I want to begin using coping mechanisms that might somehow appear 'different' and I want to ensure that my boss is not surprised.
Cheers,
Mungo
Telling my boss about my ADHD made absolutely no difference in his behavior towards me and my performance reviews whatsoever! It seemed to him just an excuse for my mistakes. Nevertheless, I think my awareness of my ADHD helped me, more than him.
ReplyDeleteI think having ADHD in many workplaces is not taken too seriously.
But, I congratulate you on your courage.
I appreciate reading this. I have just recently, last week, received an official diagnosis and am on day 5 of Straterra. I have taken Adderall XR for 2 years and the minor effects seem to have waned a bit. I went to a specialist in Adult ADHD and am very optimistic about the prospect of putting the best attention (pun intended) on this process. I have an ongoing internal debate about telling my boss though. I have had some performance issues in the last year or so which is why I am seeking to make a real effort to resolve the medication and treatment issue. I am just concerned that it may be taken as an excuse and that is not my intent. I just want the boss to know that I am very interested and optimistic for a very positive turnout and that I am "on it"
ReplyDelete